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One Death, Many Losses
by Tammy Miser
That fatal night
The phone rang late October 29, 2003. I was near by and heard Mark say,
“ There was a blast at Hayes Lemmerz.” I immediately thought “not
again” then my mind switched to Shawn. “Oh my God it’s Shawn, it’s
Shawn isn’t it?”
Jeff (a co-worker and friend) stayed with Shawn until he was rushed to
Fort Wayne. Unable to contact family members Mark called the St. Joseph
hospital and they did have a young unidentified male. Mark began by giving
the nurse a description of Shawn, she informed us the male had no body
hair and 3rd degree burns over most of his body. Ultimately Shawn was
identified by apparent weight and body structure alone.
My family drove 5 hours; the whole while I was thinking to myself, praying
to myself it wasn’t Shawn and feeling sorry for the family who would
have to deal with this. Arriving at the hospital my heart sank and walking
in I felt my legs give. My Mother was waiting at the elevators to warn us
Shawn was barley recognizable and lead the way.
We walked toward the room and were met by the hospitals Chaplin; he
expressed his condolences and cautioned us of Shawn’s war like
condition. I thought to myself, “Shawn is a tough cookie, he’ll do
fine, I’ll take him home and I’ll care for him”. Walking in I saw
Shawn’s face peeking out of the blankets then I gave everyone a hug and
gained the courage to confront Shawn. My God Shawn was swollen and his
face was splitting but I could still tell it was him, I could still see
his cute little nose and the remnants of his light red eyebrows. I started
to lift the blankets and my mother stopped me, the Doctors refused to
bandage his body; they told her there was nothing left to save.
Mom proceeded to tell me they waited on us, waited on us for what? They
planned to take Shawn off his breathing apparatus. I didn’t want them to
take Shawn off, I loved him, I would take him home, I would take him if
they had to take his arms and legs and I couldn’t believe they would
even suggest that. I knew Shawn wouldn’t want to live that way but I
didn’t care. Maybe he changed his mind or maybe he didn’t know how
much we all loved him or how much we would miss him. We did let Shawn go
that morning; it was the hardest thing I ever had to do. I still feel the
guilt of killing my brother; he may have been that one with the power to
overcome and we did not give him that chance.
Shawn’s last moments
Shawn and a couple of others went in to relight the furnace (this was
normal for Hayes because they had fires on a daily basis) and they all
decided to stick around a few minutes to make sure everything was ok.
Things seemed fine so they went back to gather tools. Shawn was directly
behind the furnace with his back toward the furnace when the first
explosion occurred. Some stated that Shawn got up and started walking
toward the doors (this can not be confirmed) then there was a second and
more intense blast. The heat from the blast was hot enough to melt copper
piping (1084.62 °C / 1984.32 °F). Shawn did not die instantly like one
would think, he laid on building floor smoldering while the aluminum dust
continued to burn through his flesh and muscle tissue. The breaths that he
took while in the building burned his internal organs. Thank God the blast
took his eyesight. My brother had no nerve endings and was a fleshy
carcass. Shawn was still conscious and asking for help when the ambulance
took him.
The kind of person Shawn was
Shawn was 33, never married, had no children; he was a great host, loved
company and would do anything for anyone. Shawn enjoyed his nieces and
nephew; he loved to entertain them buying a pool and an old tractor for
their entertainment. He bought my oldest daughter her first car and took
her out driving many times. He was especially thrilled when I had my son
calling him “The Boy”.
Shawn was proud of his county home, his English bulldog (Duchess) and the
fact that he was going back to school. Shawn took pride in everything he
did and enjoyed life to it’s fullest. He enjoyed football, racing, model
trains and digging things up from anywhere to see if it could be fixed and
give it to someone in need. Shawn was always trying something new just to
see if he could do it and was childlike in his excitement. Shawn was a
kind and loving Son, brother, uncle and friend.
The system & accountability
The employer would not return calls and/or mail more than likely because
they had been advised by lawyers to have minimal contact. IOSHA issued
Safety Orders alleging that Hayes Lemmerz International-Huntington, Inc.
violated the Indiana Occupational Safety and Health Act. The fines totaled
$42,000, representing seven serious violations, to be paid to IOSHA in
three payments of $14,000, with the last payment being made no later than
60 days past May 10, 2004. Hayes Lermmerz was also to make a donation the
St. Joseph burn unit. OSHA concluded Hayes Lemmerz did not show plain
indifference or intentional disregard in Shawn’s case. They came to this
conclusion by consulting with the Labor Board and lawyers. Indiana workers
or their surviving family members cannot sue their employers in civil
court but may bring a claim before Indiana Workers Compensation Board, and
a civil law judge will review the case and determine a financial
settlement. Shawn was not eligible for any such a payment because he was
unmarried and had no children.
All these decisions about my brother’s death were made without one word
to his family or any input from us being considered. Shawn valued higher
education and children; I felt he would have rather a donation be given
for collage scholarships, there are still no new or planned regulations
for flammable dust and there were no moneys paid out in Shawn’s behalf
making it cheaper and easier to kill someone than it is to fix an issue.
A workplace death is so different from any other. Normally if someone is
killed you know someone is responsible, they will go to trial and be held
accountable. In a workers death there is almost never any accountability.
The after effects
A sister
I have dealt with death before but none has compared to this. I truly felt
dead inside, as though I no longer occupied my body. I was physically ill,
couldn’t eat, sleep, or focus. The numbness of it all even affected my
hearing. I couldn’t believe we just let Shawn go; we should have
protected him, he was alone and I will never see him again. No more Hey
Sis!, dreams of red headed nieces and nephews, and famous deep fried
turkeys. Shawn will never know how much I genuinely loved him.
Being a parent there are very few people in life that you feel will care
for your children as well as you. Who will love them, respect them, give
them a good moral system, be there for them in their time of need and
share their accomplishments. Shawn was to be the caregiver of my children
if ever anything happened to my husband and I, now I have the burden of
not knowing what will happen to my children if I am no longer able to.
I didn’t just loose a brother I lost part of my support line; he was a
treasured friend. Shawn came to my home and called many times knowing I
was the only one there, we had coffee and talked about almost anything. He
never judged me as a mother, sister or wife he just gave his opinion if
asked. If I ever need Shawn he was just a call away.
They say that time heals but I’m not so sure. I feel that time numbs,
like watching a shocking movie and replaying the crime scene over and over
in your mind until somehow it doesn’t seem as terrifying and no longer
influences your heart. If the effects of time are allowed who will stand
up, who will fight for children’s future right to a safe and hazard free
workplace and who will truly be there for other families in need. For now
I choose to keep my pain, a piece of the anger and guard my heart from the
calluses of tragedy.
A nephew
My five-year-old son was the hardest to deal with after loosing Shawn.
Shawn was like a second father to Zak, always taking the time to make him
feel gifted, as if he was essential in his life. When I stop and think
about it: I really don’t think I have ever seen an Uncle as proud of his
nieces and nephew as Shawn.
Zak felt God could do anything and he would bring Shawn back when that
failed, all he needed was a star or magic; he became desperate and stated
he wanted to die so he could see Shawn again. We finally convinced him
that we loved him and needed him here with us. Zak still has nightmares on
a daily basis and is petrified of hospitals feeling that once someone goes
in they never come out. His fear is that we to will go to work and never
come home. Zak’s biggest concern is that Shawn will forget him or he
will forget Shawn. Zak has lost an uncle, second father and mentor.
A mother
My Son Shawn Duane Boone
by Hope Mock
October 29 2003 I got a call from my Daughter (Tammy) and Son-in-law
(Mark) telling me Shawn was in an accident at work, after calling three or
four hospitals we finally found out where he was. They said that we better
get there as soon as possible. When we got there the Doctors said there
was no hope. They said they weren’t going to do anything to try to save
him and they were not even going to bandage his wounds. I told them I
didn’t want to here any more I just wanted to see my son. Later the
Pastor told us he hadn’t seen anything that bad since they dropped the
bomb. The doctors also said they had never seen anyone that bad. They were
just keeping him alive so we all could say our good byes. As we were
waiting his face kept swelling. Black fluid was coming out of his lungs.
He had no hair; at least he still had his eyebrows. Through it all I could
still see my baby’s face. My oldest son (Stacy) and his wife (Jennifer),
Shawn’s friends and relatives were there. A short time later my youngest
son (Tommy) came in and they told him while we in the room. They were
rather blunt and I think it hit him rather hard. It took a long time for
my daughter and her family to get there because they live in Kentucky and
we were in Indiana. After all Shawn’s friend’s, Aunts, Uncles and all
of us said our good byes they took him off the respirator it took Shawn
about 20 minuets to go.
We had to have him cremated it took to long to have that done so we had
the funeral with out Shawn being there. We didn’t even get to bury Him
in one piece. No one was able to see him for the last time, just a picture
of him. When there is no one lying there to take a last look at for some
people it is just like it didn’t happen.
We were told all kinds of stories about what happened, he walked out on
his own, the blast was so strong it instantly knocked him out, he lost
some of his limbs and he was awake and aware of what was going on around
him. Later after we got a copy of the fire report we found out he was
awake and knew what was going on. In fact as far as we know Shawn last
words were (I’m in a world of hurt). This was in one of the Firemen
statements. Being Shawn’s Mother I don’t want to believe the last
thing my baby done was scream I’m in a world of Hurt. So for me for now,
I keep thinking I will get back up to the hospital to see Shawn tomorrow
and he will soon be getting home and all his things will be here for him.
His dog Duchess was his Baby and she is here with me waiting.
Thank you for hearing about my son
A brother-in-law
In Memory Of Shawn D. Boone
by Mark Miser
I got the call around 10pm on Oct 29th 2003 telling me Shawn had been in a
very bad accident at work, an explosion involving the chip melt system
that had caught fire several times before when I was still employed at
Hayes. I remember that I was getting ready for a trip to Las Vegas where I
would meet Tommy to do some long awaited gambling there. We had been
planning this for a very long time I am talking years. The call came from
my good friend and former co-worker Jeff Routzahn who was the paint
engineer at Hayes Lemmerz where I used to work and where Shawn still
worked. He had called to let me know that he had seen Shawn being
transported via a helicopter to the burn center in Fort Wayne. I
immediately let Tammy know what had happened, we were both in shock. I
called the hospital to find out if this was true and how Shawn was doing;
they did not even know his name. I wanted to jump through the phone and be
there for him. We called all the family, Tommy, Tammy’s mom and Stacy.
The hospital told us Shawn was not going to make it; we left for Indiana
immediately…
Shawn died at 6am that morning Oct 30th 2003, we all said goodbye before
it happened, we all cried and wondered when we would wake up from this
nightmare. Zak says that Shawn came out to the waiting room and set with
him while we were all in the hospital room saying goodbye. We all just
assumed that Zak was seeing things or mistook someone else for Shawn. I
believe that maybe Shawn did sit with Zak, I mean he was scared and
confused and Shawn would be there for the kids always, why not now?
I think of Shawn everyday and wonder if things could have been different.
I sometimes go to call Shawn and remember that I can’t. I think when we
buried him it helped me to know that at least we knew where he is now. I
mean before it was like he just disappeared and when couldn’t find him.
I never had brothers growing up and when I married Tammy I gained 3
brothers, I took that serious and had a connection to each of them. So
when Shawn died I lost my brother not a brother-in-law. Shawn was also
very close to my dad and when dad died Shawn was there for my family and
me. My family was there when we buried Shawn, it was personal and it gave
me closure on that, but it will never fill the emptiness I have now. Tammy
has done so much for the cause and I get strength from that, I will never
forgive Hayes for their thoughtlessness at Shawn’s memorial and all the
days since the explosion. I’m sure that they don’t care and I could
care even less about that.
This article was supposed to tell you how I feel since Shawn died and how
I coped with it. I hope that this has told you something about how I feel
and my recollection of the whole tragedy. The fact is I don’t know just
how I feel now; I miss Shawn and wish I had never got him the job at
Hayes. Shawn is my brother and that can’t change, he was my friend and
that can’t change either, Shawn was always there when I needed him and
that has changed. Sometimes I wonder if we should have kept Shawn alive,
maybe we could have done something, but then I realize that would have
been selfish and Shawn would have suffered more for no reason but our own
selfishness. Still it haunts me.
I talk about Shawn a lot at work, I want people to know whom Shawn was and
they have a connection with him because he worked in the same business as
they do. He was their fellow worker and that feels good. It also feels
good that Tammy is working hard to make sure that this does not happen
again to someone else. In the process Shawn will be remembered by a lot of
people and that is good!!
A niece
by Megan Miser
(14 years old)
The only thing I had to worry about that night was getting my homework
done. The phone rang and about five minutes later my Mom was pounding on
the door telling me to get my bags packed. Of course I was clueless and
stood there wondering what the heck was going on.
I thought Shawn was going to be fine and told myself that I would go to
the hospital and he’d be fine they were all just exaggerating like they
always did. When I saw friends and family in the waiting room crying I
started to get worried. Everyone went into Shawn’s room to see him, when
they asked me I couldn’t bear to see him after what everyone had said.
The cries and stories were horrible.
I never knew the death of one man could affect so many people. I expected
50 people and over 300 people showed up to my Uncles funeral. There was
hugging, during and people telling me how much I have grown; people I
didn’t even know.
Crying isn’t my bag so I tried to stay outside and no tears came until
Dave (one of Shawn’s close friends) read his poem. I use a box of
tissues in that minute. I don’t know what to do or say but Shawn’s
death has change myself and many others and I might not cry but I still
think of Shawn and miss him.
A niece
By Sheena Miser
(19 years old)
The first thing I remember was answering the phone sometime after 10pm and
thinking, “Who would be calling the house right now?” It was Adrien,
and he told me that there was an explosion at Hayes. I immediately
thought, “How could they let this happen again?” I didn’t think that
it was anything serious at the time. I certainly didn’t think that
anyone was hurt, or killed for that matter, I soon told Dad and it seemed
only minute later when the phone rang again- and again, Then I started
thinking something else was wrong, it still didn’t occur to me that my
uncle was working that night. However, when Mom came up the stair s and
was crying, I knew what was wrong, I told her it would be okay, and that
she’d be able to see him, God only knows how much I hoped that I was
right.
It’s hard to see your parents in so much pain and not knowing what to do
for themselves. A situation such as this, makes people crazy in mourning,
but it was so much harder seeing my Uncle Shawn, some one whom I had seen
nearly every single day, someone so kind, looking the way he did. This is
someone that I loved dearly and thought of as a second father; I mean we
were his “kids”, his family. And there was nothing that I could do to
help him. I think one of the worst things was that he didn’t look like
himself at all.
Once Shawn had passed away and we all gathered in a small room across the
hall, we were able to go in alone and say what we needed to with Shawn. I
remember kissing his forehead and telling him how sorry I was that this
had happened, and how much I love him.
To this day it’s still hard to think about thanksgiving and him telling
me. “Hunny that cheesecake looks great.” Or on graduation, “ I’m
so proud of you Sheena, hunny.” Or his humorous words:
“Congratulations!!!! Stay in school and go to college…it’s cheaper
than real life! I love you very much.” Shawn was someone that made you
feel special and treated you with respect and love. I’ll always think of
him when I think of “family”, and when I do I’ll remember someone
great, my Uncle “Boone.”
I love you Shawn.
One death, many losses
5,559 workers were killed in 2003 how many people’s lives were altered
in just that one year? Shawn’s death brought over 300 to his funeral he
touched many in the 33 years he had. Who knows what gifts were taken from
them. What I do know is that out of one death comes many losses.
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